I realize that almost no one reads weekend posts, but this was simply too good to let alone. I recently got a comment in my inbox about a long gone boobs as products and, well, just see for yourself.
I’m a male who’s taken an interest in gender studies, and I feel inclined to point out that you are only gaining ground for women and equality with these products.
1) The men who buy these products (though plenty of women would love them too) are going from a point where boobs/women are extra-ordinary to a point where they can finally be seen as ordinary and common place. In other words, when you get tired of your boobs being seen as something more than the heavy burden that they are to you, your guy friends with these products might just relate or sympathize because they’d learn to see them as nothing special.
2) While you’ve been seeing gender norms as a personal problem for you, have you ever noticed how men hardly ever get to be hugged in society? As gender norms stand, sex is the only way in which a man is allowed to display or gain physical affection. At least this way, with a stress boob, boob soap dispenser, or boob pillow, a man can relieve himself of this stress through fantasies that aren’t only centered around what happens to his penis. Then, when you expect that such a man passing by would usually be trying to hump your leg, he’ll likely not care because he’s done something to relieve himself of his problem that arises from gender norms which hinder men.
The solution to equality, no matter how unjust or unfortunate one side or another has endured, is give and take. Give a dog a bone and he’ll stop begging for what’s on your plate. If that’s not a compromise that you feel comfortable with, then I might suggest that there’s a possibility that you as a woman are feeling the tension that can come from the threat of losing your own gender privilege. Try considering that when you tell men that they should give up their privileges of power to suit your needs.
Where to even begin. I would first point this commenter to the feminism 101 blog, specifically to the patriarchy hurts men too section.
Lastly, I would highly recommend reading up on male privilege, with special attention paid to what the role is for a privilege person entering the space of a non-privileged group (I recommend starting with these two posts: A Deeper Look at “Minority Spaces” and “Check my what?” On privilege and what we can do about it). Oh, and don’t forget to check out the Related Reading section below.
Secondly I would like to give a brief commentary. You’ve proven than an interest is certainly not an education and should not be treated as such. Boobs are not extraordinary in our culture, you can see them morning noon and night in real life and on the internet, interest has not waned, try a new argument. I’m not sure how it is my fault that the patriarchy has instructed men that displays of non-sexual physical affection are feminine and therefore bad and undesireable. I do not feel personally responsible for the tenacity of this belief, nor do I feel that I should just grin and bear the commodification of women’s bodies for the stress relief of men. Furthermore, I have to question what sort of men you know that have to hump legs if they don’t get “stress relief” in the form of bathtime boobies. Lastly, I think it takes brass ones to come in and say that I should be just dandy with the commodification of the female body since it’ll help me out in the long run (oh those savage men, they’re not allowed to hug so they can only hump–and you don’t want them to hump you right?) while you proclaim that I’m the one with gender privilege. Pot meet kettle. Women are supposed to bear the burden because the patriarchy told you you couldn’t hug? The same patriarchy that tells women their bodies are up for grabs and their emotions are stupid because they’re women? Maybe you should consider your own gender privilege that allows you to think it is appropriate to tell women to grin and bear being treated as disembodied parts for sale if they don’t want their legs humped.
Edit: I just recovered Steve’s last comment:
No manafanana, I mentioned one course, I’ve taken more. You three are morons. It’s not worth explaining the details because you just want to insult any man who dares to speak in your presence.
I am on the side of real feminism as it is not applied as a fight against men but rather a fight against gender as a social construct. Choose your battles more wisely in the future and you might help make progress instead of contributing to the bad rap that women are given.
Yes ladies, he’s on the real side of feminism. You know, the one where you tell women how to speak and feel, ignore what they say and fall into patriarchal stereotypes about how all women treat men differently based on their sexuality. But most of all–women should just get over being treated like commodities for the betterment of all. Better go turn in your feminism cards now if you aren’t on the bus with “real feminism” or else you’ll contribute to his prejudices against women. Oh no. The power is youuuuuuuuuuuuuuurs to make men treat you like a human being–by allowing yourself to be treated like an object.